You might remember that way back when I was a little tyke that I embarked on a mobility and strength regimen? Well, that program might very well be the only thing in the country paying dividends.
I've been crawling for more than three months these days, and I'm fast and strong, if I say so myself. As I mentioned in my last post, I was working my upper body strength while avoiding my enslavers. Well, the last two months have seen many of my escape attempts foiled, but I continue to lull my captors into a false sense of security with smiles, giggles and cute noises. I'm crafty, you see.
Rather than spend time updating you on my progress, I was busy searching the various holding cells for items that might be useful. After seeing the end of Shawshank Redemption, I even tried to gnaw my way out of my prison crib using my new teeth, but my captors caught me and placed a gummy strip over the wood, erasing my progress and preventing further attempts using this effective, though slow, method.
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